I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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