So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I wish I only lived at night.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
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As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
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Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize