And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize