absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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