Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
