never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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