I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize