But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
