im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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