you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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