how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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