This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
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Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
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Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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