You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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