Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
