Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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