He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
