remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize