He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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