i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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