Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Randomize
