I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now