Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
