you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
