: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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