She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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