its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
why is half of my head shaved?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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