if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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