Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
