You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
this beer tastes like vomit already
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
