that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
