Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
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you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
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I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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