So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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