So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
I'm really busy with my period
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