Do you still have your period?
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
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