there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.