More tranny stories later!
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
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We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
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I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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