How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
