so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
