So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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