5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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