I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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