Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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