Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
The uberlube is also flammable
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Randomize
