peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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