She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
