well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
