I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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