Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
