There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
This is my life. Enjoy the view
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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