weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
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